First Love

最後のキスはタバコの flavor がした，ニガくてせつない香り。
Our last kiss tasted like tobacco, a bitter and sad smell.

I can vaguely remember the last kiss we had, and I have no idea back then that it will be our last kiss. Things happened so fast that it seems like it was just yesterday. A lot of sweet and precious memories flashed through my eyes, snapshots from the day I first set eyes on you, to the very last day I saw you off at the airport. That day, we did not even hug or kiss, just looking into each other eyes, not knowing that a few months later we are no longer together.

明日の今頃には，あなたはどこにいるんだろう，誰を想ってるんだろう？
This time tomorrow, where will you be? Who will you be thinking of?

Distance has always been a problem. Even though you had faith in me, I did not. Most of the time, I would like to know your whereabouts, who you are going out with, what are you doing, etc. Sometimes it made me look like a control freak, when actually I was the one feeling insecure that I might lose you to someone else. I have never expected to repay your faith to me by calling our relationship off abruptly. Especially when you have shown further commitment of coming over and live a life that you were not very keen of. Especially when you have already told everyone of your decision and had everything arranged. I have made a grave mistake.

You are always gonna be my love，いつか誰かとまた恋に落ちても。
You are always gonna be my love, even if I fall in love with someone once again.
I'll remember to love, you taught me how.
I'll remember to love, you taught me how.

Over all these years, we have experienced a lot of things, we had our ups and downs. Inevitably our relationship was not able to carry on with the burden I have irresponsibly piled on. I will always remember what you taught me about loving someone, and practice it to perfection as my only way to compensate the hurt that I have caused to your heart. I will treat my next lover the way I should have treated you, to unconditionally love her.

You are always gonna be the one，今はまだ悲しい love song，
You are always gonna be the one, it's still a sad love song,
新しい歌，歌えるまで。
until I can sing a new song.

Even though we had a sad ending, I hope that both our new love song will be a happy one. I sincerely wish that you will find your true happiness and live happily ever after. Heaven knows, right?

立ち止まる時間が，動き出そうとしてる，忘れたくないことばかり。
The paused time, is about to start moving, there are many things that I do not want to forget.

People said that time can fade away feelings, thoughts and emotions. Yet there are a lot of things I do not want to forget, even when the flowing river of time is slowly washing away all those memories. And memories is the only thing I get to keep after our relationship has expired.

明日の今頃には，わたしはきっと泣いてる，あなたを想ってるんだろう。
This time tomorrow, I will probably be crying, I will probably be thinking of you.

I have no intention to let you know how sad I was for doing something stupid. Crying is just a way of releasing my emotions, or a way to make me feel better after making such a dire mistake. I have no one to blame, but myself. Thinking of you reminds me of the mistakes I have made, so that I will not repeat the same mistakes again.

You will always be inside my heart， いつもあなただけの場所があるから，
You will always be inside my heart, you will always have your own place,
I hope that I have a place in your heart too, now and forever you are still the one.
I hope that I have a place in your heart too, now and forever you are still the one.
今はまだ悲しい love song，新しい歌，歌えるまで。
It's still a sad love song, until I can sing a new song.

Regardless of what have happened, you will always have a special place in my heart, and I shall bring that to my grave. I dare not ask for a place in your heart, but I do hope that you will not forget me. Even if I have learnt a new song, I would still remember this old one by heart. Now and forever.

You are always gonna be my love，いつか誰かとまた恋に落ちても，
You are always gonna be my love, even if I fall in love with someone once again,
I'll remember to love, you taught me how,
I'll remember to love, you taught me how,
You are always gonna be the one，まだ悲しい love song，
You are always gonna be the one, the sad love song,
Now and forever...
Now and forever...

To many, or even yourself, would think that this was not my first love. But I know it myself, it was my first true love.